Pig jokes

What should you say to a pig on roller skates? Don't say anything. Just get out of the way.

Another jokes:

Late one night, a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money", he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "Hey, watch it - I'm a United States Congressman!" "In that case," replied the mugger, "give me MY money."
Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party? Because he just came to pick up his little sister.
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he's finished.
I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like. How do you do that? I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's raining!
Q: Why do Polish names end in "ski" ? A: Because they can't spell tobbagan.

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