halloween jokes - Jokes at Nerida
Jokes: halloween jokes
- A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet
over his head.
'Are you here as a ghost ?' asked his
friends
'No, I'm an undercover agent".
- A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet
over his head.
"Are you here as a ghost?" asked his friends.
"No," he replied, "I'm an unmade bed."
Another boy wore a sheet
over his head.
"Are you an unmade bed?" asked his friends.
"No,
I'm an undercover agent," he replied.
- A Toledo man was
admitted to the city
hospital last night with severe burns after dunking for
French fries
at a Halloween party.
- At 5 P.M. one Halloween afternoon, my dental
hygienist realized that she wouldn't make it to the store in time
to
get snacks for trick-or-treaters. So she took home some free
samples
from the office supply cabinet. That night she handed out
dozens of
toothbrushes, toothpaste, and dental floss. The next year,
although she had
bags of chips and popcorn, not one child came
knocking at her
door.
- Doctor, doctor, I'm so ugly. What can I do
about it?
Hire yourself out for Halloween parties.
- Girl 1: "Can I invite a few friends to your
Halloween party?"
Girl 2: "Sure. The more, the scarier!"
- How do you get the most apples when bobbing
at Halloween
Wear a snorkel !
- How do zombies celebrate Halloween?
They
paint the town dead!
- One Halloween this woman opens her
door
to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly
hair
and the biggest blue eyes.
She was dressed as an Angel, and was
just delightful. The woman said,
"what are you supposed to say
sweetheart?"
The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or
Tweat!"
The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her
husband to
come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead
honey say it
just one more time."
Once again the little
Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!"
The husband agrees with
his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest
thing. The woman
picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with
her apron, and
drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag.
The little Angel
looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says,
"Thanks a lot
lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!"
- Q: What do
birds give out on Halloween?
A: Tweets.
- Q: What do little trees say
on
Halloween? A: Twig or treat.
- Q: What's Osama Bin Laden going to be for
Halloween?
A: Dead.
- What did the ghost serve at his Halloween
party?
Hallowieners!
- What did the really ugly man do for a living?
He posed for Halloween masks.
- What do
stupid kids do at Halloween
?
They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins !
- What do birds say on Halloween?
"Trick-or-tweet!"
- What do fishermen say
on Halloween?
"Trick-or-trout!"
- What do rednecks do on
Halloween?
Pump-kin!
- What do witches eat at Halloween
?
Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie !
- What do witches eat at Halloween?
Spook-etti, Halloweenies, Devil's food cake and Boo-berry pie.
- What do you call a bug that bothers dogs on
Halloween?
A trick-or-fleat!
- What happened to the girl who
wore a
mouse costume to her Halloween party?
The cat ate her.
- What happened when the girl dressed as
a
spoon left the Halloween party ?
No one moved. They couldn't stir
without her.
- What happened when the girl dressed as a
spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldn't stir
without
her.
- What is a childs's favourite type of
Halloween candy?
Lots a candy.
- What kind of make up was the girl wearing on
Halloween?
Mash-scara!
- What kind of protozoa likes
Halloween?
An amoeboo!
- What would you get if you
crossed
Halloween with Independence Day?
The Fourth of Ghoul-ly!
- What would you get if you crossed Halloween
with
Christmas?
A ghoul Yule!
- Where do ghoulies
go to on the day
before Halloween party?
To the boo-ty parlour.
- Where's the most dangerous place to go
trick-or-treating?
On the psycho path!
- Who turns the lights off at halloween
?
The light's witch !
- Why
did the wizard wear a yellow robe to
the Halloween party?
He was going as a banana.
- Why are teachers happy at Halloween
parties?
Because there's lots of school spirit!
- Why aren't burgers the
least bit scared
of Halloween?
They're used to people 'goblin' them!
- Why did the boy carry a clock and a
bird
on Halloween ?
It was for 'tick or tweet' !
- Why is the air so clean and
healthy on
Halloween?
Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.
- Why is the air so clean and healthy on
Halloween?
Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.
- Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for
the best costume at
the Halloween party?
Because he just came
to pick up his little sister.
- Why were the trick-or-treaters wearing grass
skirts?
Because it was Hulaween!
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